Friday, January 29, 2016

WHEN MY HEART IS.....


When my heart is overwhelmed, I run to you....

I've often written these words,
So many times I've sang them over and over again,
Creating a song in my mind and in my  heart,
The cry in my heart up to the Lord.

Overwhelmed.

I find myself there so many times.
Too many things going on, too many scenarios in my mind, like a hundred books opening all at once and rushing me to that part in the story where all the action, all the drama, the heartbreak, and the emotions are breaking forth. Like a dam that is holding up the water, and suddenly some kind of catastrophe causes it lose its strength and ability to be powerful enough to stay in place. Without a warning, the wall breaks and the water gushes forth with all its might, falling down, crashing through without mercy.

Life has a way of breaking us down.
When we are overwhelmed, it seems we can't think straight and many times we begin to lose hope.
So, what do we do when our faith begins to feels like something that is just a word but not a reality in our lives? What do we do when the person we once were, strong enough to talk to the mountains in our life to move out of the way, suddenly feels too tired to even command the winds to be still? What happens when we feel so drained of our energy and tired that the voice in us that once challenged our enemies to come forth so we could take them on, now seems to crawl back in bed under the covers to hide and beg for a few more minutes of sleep?
What do we do when we are overwhelmed?

Lord, I run, I run with my whole ambition and last breath to you.
I run with my legs that refuse to run and I move forward even when my lungs tell me to stop.
Lord, I move with my eyes set on an Invisible Mark that is before me.
I run to YOU.

Run! Walk! or like my mom says, "Drag yourself like the snail if you have to." But do what you need to do in order to be in God's presence and find your faith again, find your peace again, and find your joy again. Unclog your heart, open it up and drain the muck and junk that is clogging up your heart, keeping you from singing and rejoicing. Open up your heart again and ask the Lord to empty you out so that waters of God's presence can rain into your heart and renew, restore and make all things new.

When my heart is overwhelmed, I turn to you, I run to you Lord.

Written by Angeline M Duran Santiago