Wednesday, June 26, 2013


Maybe this part of my blog is not for you. If your life is perfect and you can keep it right all the time, then please don't even bother to keep reading. You see, the truth is, we all feel messed up every now and then. I know I do. I get tired, I mean exhausted. I also get frustrated and angry. And, maybe that's a little too much information for you. You are not ready for that because you are always on fire, you keep it real, nothing ever gets you down, and you can't believe a believer, a real Christian would ever say what I'm saying.

There are days when I just wonder, "Lord, where do I belong?" or, "What steps do I take next. I'm here. Stuck. I want to go forward...I do. I'm ready. Ready to be released into what your divine plan is but each time I go forward, life, yes, life, pushes me back."

Life can do that sometimes. I know. Not you. You have never been in this kind of moment. Your life is different. You have it altogether. Maybe you are one those persons that even feels they can actually brag about how well things are going, because maybe, just maybe, you're one of those people that live their lives making sure other people stay down. You walk around with this look as if everything you do is for the glory of God, but in reality, you're a big fake.

I don't want to be fake. I've never played the role and don't plan on starting to act it any time soon.

Life hurts. People get sick. We pray. Many times God heals and some times, He calls them home.
Life isn't easy. We wait upon the Lord for a financial breakthrough. God blesses some with abundance and those that do not have more than enough are always made to feel like there must be some sin in your life that keeps heaven's door closed to you when it comes to prosperity.

People let you down and sometimes hurt you with the things they say and do.
That's the reality of this life. Things will not always go our way. But, what if, in the midst of feeling crappy, we can lift our head and let our eyes climb their way up, and remain on the Author and Finisher of our faith?

Just because I'm not feeling super amazing today, doesn't mean my life with the Lord is shattered and that I've opened a door to allow sin to come and hang out. The reality of my pain, my lack of material things, and the reality of my distress at the moment does not give you permission to analyze me and try to figure out where I've messed up or walked away from the Lord.

We have all been in a broken place where we can't pray or just don't feel like it. I have been there and I'm not afraid to share it. It's what we choose to do to not stay there that makes all the difference. See, we are called to pray. But, when you pray, do you pray for people like you're reading a prayer book or reciting a rosary? Or do you ask the Lord to show you what people around you are going through? Do you call on the Lord and ask God's provision and help for those that you know in your heart they are being oppressed, even though they walk around with a big smile, but God lets you know it is time to do warfare on their behalf?

Maybe you shouldn't have read this...But, if you made it to the end, then our prayer life has to change. I know too many people struggling and it seems no matter the preaching, the reading, the prayer, something is not changing. I believe God is calling me back to my days of when I first gave my life to Him. An intimacy I haven't had in a long time. Times of prayer and surrender, even if I stand alone. I'm tired of just existing. There is more. And if He promised things in our past, He is not a man to say, "Aw, man, you know, Sorry, I forgot, I just can't do it now, because well you know." God is not one to back down and leave us in the pit.

Will you allow your life to hunger for God's presence again, in a greater way?
Will you make a decision to seek God like never before?

This is where my life, my journey is taking me and I thought maybe someone out there has been where I am, or maybe you understand because you are here too.
Let us take our brokenness and lay it at the feet of the Cross and not give up. God is not done with you or me. Just because the answer has not come the way we want or when we expect it doesn't mean He is not at work in our lives. Let us stand together and wait. Let us pray for one another. I believe He will do a great thing. Why? I have seen too many miracles in my life to begin to doubt.



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