TIME IN HIS PRESENCE

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By Angeline M Duran Santiago

Saturday morning, I put aside how I was feeling and a mind filled with a million things to do according to my calendar. It had been a few days already and all I knew was that I was hungry, deep in my heart to be just be present in the house of the Lord. I had been living on small bites of prayer here and there and my insides were anxious for the Bread of Life.

Entering the sanctuary, I inwardly rejoiced to find the sanctuary just as I had wished it and seen it in my heart. Nothing had started yet and to find an empty church to me was finding a gold mine. I had dragged myself and willed myself to obey the longing in my heart, and oh, how wonderful to find the space all for me.

Taking advantage of the time alone and not knowing how long I’d have the place to myself, I came before the Lord. As I just spoke my thoughts and my heart out, I saw myself as the woman with the issue of blood in the Bible who was pressing through the multitude, pushing through, being bruised, pushed and maybe even trampled on at some point, but she persevered and crawled if she had to if only to touch the hem of His garment. “I’m here, Lord.” I said. “I don’t know how to push through anymore. I’m tired. I’m exhausted. I’m waiting and believing that You are in control and that You have a plan, but I’m still here surrounded by the multitude that reminds me of all the unanswered prayers, of my mishaps and mess ups. I’m pushed against and yelled at by those who remind me there’s still something wrong with me, or that I’m not enough, or that this is my destiny; to live with unanswered prayers, family that need healing, loved ones that can’t break through their addictions, and a fight that never ends.”

I poured out my heart to the Lord and saw myself taking that stand where I am usually found, one that declares, “I can fight a little longer because the Lord is with me, I will not be afraid!” Then I asked the Lord to help me to get my eyes and my heart off of everything and everyone that took up my space and my time, so that I could focus on Him, His Voice and His leading. “Remove those things that in my life that keep me so occupied and worried that I take care of them and forget to trust you and surrender it all to you. Help me to focus and keep my eyes and my heart on You.”

Voices behind me where a sign that my alone time with the Lord which I cherished so much had come to an end and I would have to share His Presence. And, that was ok, for the room was being filled with women just like me that perhaps had also ended up here pushing through the crowds of their family obligations, their burdens and their hang ups. But, they were here, to soak in His Presence.

The time of worship was lovely. I knew without a doubt that I belonged here, in this moment. Soon afterwards, the speaker took her part. My heart was astonished as she shared. “How, Lord? How could this be?” She spoke and her words were the words I had spoken to the Lord in secret. The guest speaker spoke about keeping the focus on the Lord and not only identifying the distractions, but knowing how to put them aside and making God my priority in this busy world. She spoke about the many responsibilities we have and how sometimes we have to set them all aside just to be able to be alone with Jesus and see Him at work in our lives, as He did with the little girl that was returned to life with just a spoke word. And then she shared on how Jesus took the time to pay attention to something as small as recognizing the touch of someone upon his garment. At this, I knew, if no one else was getting this message, I knew, “Lord, I am that woman. Speak into my life, I receive it.”

Although Jesus was on a mission, he was still interested in this woman with the issue of blood. She pushed her way to get to Jesus. Yes, He had what many called an emergency to attend to, a child was dying or as the story goes, she dies on the way before Jesus gets to her home. But, through it all, Jesus stopped to let this outcast of a woman who most likely felt alone, unwanted and unloved, without a purpose and at the end of her rope, He stopped to recognize her, to smile and make a big deal in regards to what she did, to bring attention to what she had done.

She had stretched forth her hand to touch Him if even with her fingertips. Maybe this was her last chance. Maybe she had planned on taking her life and ending it all if she couldn’t get Him to slow down enough to stretch through the crowd. Jesus made a big deal about her healing and her deliverance moment. Jesus stopped his mission to celebrate this woman’s faith. He knew her desperations and her intentions. Jesus knew she was moving on her final strength, and He acknowledged her. His look of love that turned from facing forward into the needs of others, made Him stop, make an about face and seek her out.

On Saturday, I was that woman.

And Jesus stopped in a corner of Keansburg and in a very gently way turned around and said, “Who has touched me?” Lord, I was that woman among so many other woman, broken, abandoned in so many ways, hurt and feeling at my end that came for a word and you spoke into my life.

The moment you feel that tug in your life to press through, push through your situations and your circumstances, leave the house and just follow the call of your heart to be in the Lord’s house as if it’s an emergency, because you know what, the dishes and the laundry will still be there when you get home. So, why worry. The Lord is calling us out for more. “Just come.” Is all I heard and I followed, and oh, how I was restored and reminded to continue to press onward.

Do not give up. Do not lose hope. Don’t let your faith be crushed by your circumstances or situations. Don’t allow the things you are experiencing determine the time you give to the Lord. Let those challenges or lack of them lead you always into His presence. For the Lord is good, and His mercy endures forever!

My PRAISE is My WEAPON!

                         ~By Angeline M Duran Santiago

Sometimes we find ourselves in situations we don't understand. "Lord, why? Why this? How could you have allowed this to happen?" We find ourselves waiting on the Lord to bring into the Light what has been foolishly and with evil done in the dark. Our heart is heavy because we harbor truths in our hearts that we cannot share and can only pray about. We keep secrets that have been shared with us and we can only take that person's pain and hardship before the Lord until God, and God alone can alter the situation and bring a breakthrough. It is God, and God alone that can open or close the doors that are needed to be open or closed. It is He who can break what has to be broken and heal what needs to be completely healed and renewed.

We find ourselves in a place, a hard place where the only one we can bring our story to is Father God. He alone can be trusted because most everyone else has failed. We can take our cares to others, hoping for a Word from the Lord, and it's so sad to see how many times, even those who we know and have seen to be the vessels of the Lord can still only supply us with with confusing messages and leave us more confused and yearning for truth, God's truth.

It is here in that place where I cannot speak and I have to keep things between God and my heart that praise, praise that comes from my hurts, my need for God's presence, a praise that is a cry like no other cry, comes out and praises the God of my heart. I acknowledge His greatness and His power because I know that this is just one more situation and one more battle that He alone, YES, God alone can take on. I know when to be still and recognize His Sovereignty. I also know when it is time to shout and give Him my praise, even if with just my heart when everyone is sleeping.

Praise is my weapon! Praise is Your weapon! Praise is mighty when we are praising the Lord!

Praise brings down the enemy and brings down the walls built around us to keep us trapped in confusion, in doubt, in trouble and without help. Praise confuses the enemy who thinks we will lay down and weep and feel abandoned. Praise invites Holy Spirit to come into my life and into my home and begin to move around with freedom. Praise, praise that comes from within, with joy and confidence changes my sadness and removes the anger, it replaces it with joy and peace in my mind. 

God abides in our praise and visits us ready to join us in battle.

Praise is my weapon. I sing and the plan and work of the enemy is shaken. I dance and the presence of darkness and all dark principalities know I will not be broken and removed from my faith and hope in Christ. I praise God and enter a place of worship where He is my everything and all I want is Him. All I need is the Lord. He prepares my hands to war. The Word of God, my Sword, moves in my life and gives me a shout of victory. He moves in my life and gives me strength I didn't have. He takes care of my situation when I decide to surrender it all to Him.

You don't know my life and I don't know yours. But, if you are facing some hard moments in your life, do not become discouraged. Don't turn it into a pity party and decide you want to die. No! You have to get up and begin to speak to the situation in your life. Speak to the circumstances that are hard in your life, in your body, in your home, at your workplace, in your ministry and in your church. Speak to those things with authority and begin to surrender them to the Lord. 

Begin to acknowledge the Lord God Almighty and Praise Him. Brothers and Sisters, something happens when you say,
"I will enter His gates with thanksgiving!" You don't need to be in church to enter into His presence. You can worship God in your bedroom. You can praise Him while you're cooking. You can cry out to Him while you're in the shower. God is not into appointments. He is available. He is attentive to your heart's cry. Let praise be your weapon today and tomorrow. Praise Him through it all!

Something will happen in your environment when you invite God into your life. The atmosphere is about to change the moment you turn up the praise that comes from your heart and bless the Lord.

Know God, Seek God, but also Know Your Enemy

By Angeline M Duran Santiago

We learn as much as we can about surviving and getting through the daily motions of life. We're born into a world that sometimes seems like a jungle, a war zone almost, and we're expected to thrive through all the storms and all the crazy moments that come our way as we go from year to year. For some, along the way, we learn about a loving Heavenly Father who sees our distress and knows our condition. He knows us so well, that He plans ahead of time to make a way for us to succeed in our lifetime, if we so choose to accept His plan for our lives and let His love inspire and light our path. 

Many times, we stray away from the path, and yet in our worst condition, a condition of the heart and mind that moves away from God and peers into the darkness or is entrapped by sin, still in that covering of sin and pain, God still bends down to listen to our cry and takes us out of our mess.

We are told to listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit and to listen to the Lord at all times. We are rarely told to be alert and pay attention to the adversary, because this too should be something we are aware of. Just as we desire to get closer to the Lord, so also there is an enemy of God that is seeking to get closer to us. Yes, God is with us and He is our protector. This doesn't mean the devil takes a break to leave us alone. He is looking for the many ways he can enter our lives to bring havoc, some disturbance, and shake us just enough to get our eyes off of the Lord and on to our situation.

Our foe is ancient. He has experienced the way humanity moves, feels and reacts in situations time and time again. He observes what draws men to certain attractions and what helps another fall into despair. For this reason, we must do our best, no matter how tired and how burdened with daily tasks we find ourselves, we must make God's presence a priority. Oh, this is such a challenge when you work so early and have to be at work for a long portion of your day. This is so hard when you come home and it's already bedtime, you're exhausted, maybe cooking dinner and just wanting to soak in the tub and go to bed.

Still, remember that the next minute in your life is not promised. No one is your life is promised life when the sun rises again. The attacks on your life will never cease and the problems around you remain whether you are strong in the Lord sometimes or too tired to pray. Life doesn't stop and wait for you to feel like praying or feel like seeking the Lord. Your reality doesn't change just because you think it can. We have to, I have to, get up and seek the Lord because He alone is my help and my fortress, my Refuge and my Deliverer, My God in whom I can trust.

God alone is my shield and the Lifter of my head. God is my Healer even and I keep declaring it until my son is healed. I must continue to declare the victory when I still don't see a complete breakthrough in my home and we are still going through difficulties. We were not born with the knowledge on how to survive, but once we were born again, God has supplies us with weapons of warfare in the spiritual realm, so that through our prayers and our praise we can cast down imaginations, bring down principalities and rulers in high places, command sickness to leave in Jesus name and stand firm,trusting in His power to prevail in our lives.

I'm going to take some time now to practice what I've shared. I need some alone time with my Jesus. I want to keep the fire burning and when it's starting to get low, I want the Lord to renew me and restore me. Keep the fire burning in my heart, Lord. Keep your presence ever kindled and true in me. My family needs you daily. Fill my home with your presence. Let your presence remove what needs to be removed and put all things in order. Rain upon us today. Shower us with your love. Remove the hurts, the veil on our eyes, and heal us. In Jesus Name. Amen.

Learning To LIsten

By Angeline M Duran Santiago

We're a people that loves to communicate via technology. We rarely speak on the phone. We text. Gone are the days where we just took the time to write a letter because we can see one another through a chat room in so many different ways. Talk, talk and talk some more but we rarely take the time to listen and really hear what others are saying.

I've been learning more on listening. It's taken me a hundred years to get it right, or at least try to, and here I am, working on my listening skills. I'm one of those persons that is quick to think and voice a response, or is it, while I"m listening, I'm ready to say my part as well? What I want to say is that I know the Lord has truly been dealing with me with really stopping myself from listening to someone but already have my mind a million seconds at a time thinking on what to say and how to say it. The Lord has been teaching me to hush, and shush, and be patient. Even if I know the response is wrong and I'm going crazy inside wanting to speak out, many times, yes, many times, the Lord has been telling me to just be silent. And, wow, is that hard to do.

It's not just at home and it's not just a work. It's in my personal time with the Lord. He's teaching me to listen and learn to listen to His Voice, His leading and His presence involved in  my life in every area. I believe that we are so busy with life and we are so tied up with our daily schedules, that we can schedule every moment of our lives, including using the restroom, but we cannot fit the Lord into our daily planner, weekly schedule or even weekend time. We're tired. We're exhausted. We're busy.

I'm learning that He desires time with me and that I need to long for that time with him as well. Just like we need to eat each day, and at different moments of the day, so we also need to nourish our lives with the Word of the Lord and with times of seeking and meditating on the Lord. I know it can seem so hard and overwhelming. But, it's in our pushing ourselves, disciplining ourselves and making it a part of our lives that we can truly be close enough to the Lord to listen.

I want to listen. I want to hear His voice and not just suppose or assume I heart or I know what He says. I want to be confident and assured of His guidance for all these hard moments that keep showing up at my door. I want to know His will so that I can successfully go about my Father's business and do what I am supposed to do. I've made enough mistakes and I'm through with making wrong decisions all because I rushed through a moment of crisis or couldn't wait on the Lord.

Listening.
I'm asking the Lord to fine tune my ears so that His voice is clear. I want to have the right connection with my Heavenly Father, no static and no interruptions. I want the Spirit of the Lord to be free to speak into my life while I sleep and while I am walking to the train station.

Listening.
I am still a student and I believe I will forever be a child sitting at my Father's feet because I want to learn more, I want to grow and be able to experience all He has for me and see all He has for my family. It's where my heart is tonight and where I hope the Lord finds me each day. Lord, let my life, my hearing and my mind be ever ready to receive your words, for they alone are life.

Lessons Learned on the Dance Floor

By Angeline M Duran Santiago

A few days ago someone asked me what is something I've learned as a person who dances for the Lord. There are so many things I could have shared and I shared some of the deepest moments in my life. Those were times of intense intercession and meeting with the Lord, on the dance floor. Those were times of surrendering my innermost struggles and experiencing the breakthrough power of a Mighty and Loving God, on the dance floor.

Once I was home, I started thinking about the question and I began to think back to my early years as someone who was dancing unto the Lord. I remember a wedding I was asked to dance in. My task was to begin the wedding, introduce the event, with a worship. I remember times of prayer and truly asking the Lord to do something special so that the atmosphere in the church was completely filled with the Spirit of the Lord. The church building was very cold and I began to feel feverish. Still, I waited for the moment to come out, and with chills and not feeling great, I began to bring forth a worship, an invitation to the Lord to come and fill that event.

Here's what I learned that day. When the wedding was over and we were heading towards the banquet hall, I heard some of the leaders in the church speaking in Spanish. It was then I heard one of the women angrily say, "That dance was completely done in the flesh! How could she have been allowed to dance?"

My heart became heavy and in my silence I went before the Lord. I examined my heart and searched to see where I could have failed and where I had not given my all to the Lord. It was later on that I was told that everyone knew how cold I was. Finding it strange, I asked how that could be. It was explained to me that my bra had no done the task to offer full coverage. It was then I understood how I was labeled all the horrible things I was labeled. 

This event gave me the opportunity to learn two things. One, always wear a extra support and heavy padded chest undergarment under my layers. We may prepare and think we're fully covered and appearing in modesty but there are cases where things can happen. It's best to be extra clothes, then have something see through sheer or body part bouncing out of place. No one, especially those in church who will never see us with the eyes of the Lord, should be given any extra opportunity to speak negatively about our dance before the Lord. Don't just go out with a skirt or a dress. Wear the correct underclothes. Remember, you are representing the King of Kings as a worshipper, in priestly garments, ready to praise and do war with your dance.

My heart has always been to make sure there is no focus on my body or the imperfections in me, but that the eyes are on the expressions and movements I make to tell the story of God's love, his power and his plan for all who say, "Yes!" to him.

The other lesson I learned was nothing new, but it was confirmed that day. We live, breathe and move for the Lord. Anyone that says they're a dancer is seeking and desiring to worship, to pray and do what they do, as I always say, for the Audience of One, the I Am, El Shaddai and My Savior. It's not about what pleasing people, looking for their approval and their recognition. The moment our dance and our ministry becomes about pleasing the "in" crowd, the "right" ministers or getting  the applause, we are one more empty shell, a mere carcass with enough fuel to move around like a rag doll that solicits the praise of men, but have lost the grace and favor of God's loving face.

I learned that my eyes belong on Jehovah. My goal is to please Him and Him alone. I learned that you can sacrifice yourself, but few really appreciate. You may make the effort to minister while feeling ill, leave your sick child with family in order to be supportive or show you can be relied on, but someone will always find an error or a reason to speak negatively. I learned that as long as I've placed the Lord first in all I do, only how He sees me matters to me. Your outfit will not be right, your something will make them talk because their eyes and their heart is not seeking the Lord and saying, "Lord, use this dancer and speak into my life." 

I learned to listen to the Lord for the songs, the movement, even if I danced alone. And, this is why, I may not be where I once was, but I am happy where I am, because all I have ever desired is to be in His will. And that's a great place to be.

It Is Enough! Rise and Go!

By Angeline M Duran Santiago

Having my morning time with the Word, I read through Mark Chapter14 and suddenly felt as if the pages had grabbed me and taken me in to the Garden of Gethsemane. The conversation became personal and I felt like someone that had once more, failed, misunderstood and not been able to complete what had been expected of me.  Reading the passage over again, I saw how these words were piercing into my heart and asking me why I had not been paying attention to the admonishing from the Lord.

 It’s been so very long that I’ve sensed the Lord telling me to really take time to be in His presence. But, it’s not the quick, 1,2,3 prayers that we throw up into the heavens like a Frisbee to our Heavenly Father, I know that I know that the Lord was inviting me to something greater. Still, like Peter, it was late, I was tired, I keep nodding off and putting off his one request, to watch and pray. He was showing me my current situation and what was to come. Just like in this passage, the Lord was asking me to watch and pray. Jesus understood what was coming. He knew the pain, the agony, the trials and the hardships of just moments away. He even voiced his thoughts, “Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” This became my prayer also. "Lord, I don't want to go through this again. God, if only you would just take all this from my life. I'm tired of the way things are going and what my kids are suffering....If only." Those quick, rushed wish lists to heaven and I still was doing my own thing and what He had asked me to do- take a moment to watch and pray.

As I meditated on this scripture, I saw the Lord being very aware of what he was about to do and endure. I also saw him telling me to open my eyes the same way and to wake up and be aware of what I was going through and what was about to take place in my life, in my near future. He was inviting me to fellowship and I was tired. I was Peter, full of faith on one side, but tired and weary on the ground. This passage resounded inside of me as I felt the Lord asking me why I was struggling with prayer. I felt ashamed. The scriptures spoke out to me, “Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.”

The Lord knows our struggles. He knows that in the midst of our flesh not being able to push through, The Lord is saying, “I know that deep inside you want to draw closer. I know you want to spend time with me. I know you long for deep intimacy where I can download into your life all that you will need for the hard times up ahead. And, I also know that it’s hard for you. But, get up girl, get up and get it together. Those quick prayers aren’t going to get you through what’s about to come your way.”

A third time the Lord comes and asks them, “Are you still sleeping and taking your rest?” “Angie, are you still sleeping? Are you still in la la land and totally ignorant of what I am asking you to do? I am telling you to get ready, to prepare and come into that place where I can fill your life. But, you’re still in a daze. You need to wake up from this slumber of going about your day and not realizing how much more you need from my presence.” The Lord tells them, “It is enough, the hour has come. The Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. Rise, let us be going! See my betrayer is approaching!"

This morning I saw these words in a different light. "It is enough, the hour has come." To me the Lord was saying, "Girl, enough wasting time and acting so indifferent. Don't you see the hour has come to open your eyes and see what's coming, what is approaching and what is around you? Can't you sense what is already coming towards you and even with your knowing of the attack and the trials, you're taking it light like it's not about you and you don't need to get serious about getting strong through seeking your Heavenly Father. It is enough. No more staying the same. Time to take a pause and make a change.

"The Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners." I felt in my heart the Lord showing me how this world has decided to take everything and everyone that represents the Kingdom of our Lord and is ready to set Him on notice to attack, take him down, a full on assault on our King of Kings. Although this world is attacking everything that stands for the Lord, we as his children do not go unnoticed. The enemy and all of the hosts of darkness are also coming out against God's children as they either seek the Lord in whole hearted devotion in the garden of Gethsemane or fall asleep. 

"Rise! let us be going!" Time to rise up and do what we have to do. And what is that thing I felt the Lord placing in my heart as urgent and immediate? Prayer, but the kind of prayer where we really and truly come before the Lord and seek his presence, love on Him and allow His love to fall upon us, prayer that seeks God with a heart full of repentance and without thinking we're good and deserve it all, but come saying, "Lord, I can't do anything without You."

I don't know if you sense the Lord asking you to do anything. I see the desperate situations in the lives of the people I love and what I've done has not been enough. I believe God is calling his children to have Elijah and Elisha moments. I believe the Lord is inviting us to surrender and believe that we can see great moments as seen in the Old Testament. I believe God is still saying He is the Great Powerful One. He says, "Trust me." The hour of darkness may come against us but God is with us and He will give us victory against the devil. God has promised to be with us as we stand against the devil, as we fight and as we push darkness back. 

Lord, show me how to enter into that moment of praying and seeking You. My home needs your touch. My family needs a breakthrough. There is a great need to be delivered from sickness, disease and infirmity. Every attack of the enemy can be broken. Anxiety, depression, and mental despair must fall down at the feet of Jesus. God will destroy the work of the enemy if we seek Him and believe. 

Well, that was my though. It's what happens when I read Scripture. My mind just sees it like a movie. My heart receives it like God's word just for me. I pray you are encouraged to pray and to stand for your family and your needs, in Jesus name, amen.

Need prayer? Inbox me. We'll pray together in Jesus Name.

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DARKNESS PLANS, GOD STILL REIGNS

By Angeline M Duran Santiago

Horrendous activities are planned against families daily. The mobs of darkness unleash their darkest conceived plans against everyone, especially those who call themselves, the so called believers and followers of Christ. Every vile and destructive imagination is unleashed against families and against individuals who have only begun to learn their ABC's and colors. Deep anger and hatred as blood that keeps the hosts of darkness moving forward, invade communities, cities and fearlessly invade homes. They use the heart and mind that becomes available to their desires and re-education of mankind to turn around once Godly values and make them the unspeakable curse word among nations. Demonic activity rises and moves through individuals that have surrendered their hearts and their will to speak out against the lifestyle that represented things Godly, holy and beautiful to twist those very ideas and make them a mockery, a ghastly ideology and a way that is challenged in the very high courts that once believed in God we trust.

You and I are not exempt. There is no label on our foreheads that says, "Able to Escape" because although we believe in a mighty God and although we do our best to live each day honoring the ideas, principles and values poured out from God's word into our hearts, we live very aware that we wrestle on a daily basis with the unseen that rises up against God's children to abolish the creation that has been made worthy of Salvation. We are part of that group that tirelessly experiences the oncoming onslaught of darkness and many times we are left on the ground, unable to stand for a moment, and so many times at the very brink of giving up the fight. The fight. Don't give up the fight. For although our fight is against principalities in the heavenly realm, it is in that realm that God's power and presence is manifested to once more cover us and keep us through the worst of attacks.

How exactly do we know we are being assaulted? Look around you and if you are alive you will realize there is a plan set forth in motion to bring you and your family, together with your community to complete ruin. I've seen this not occasionally, but on a regular basis in my own life.  My own children are constantly bombarded with horrible situations. Sickness is constantly invading our home. Our jobs went through some extreme changes the past four years. Our loss has been great financially and we've gone from being in a somewhat comfortable place to knowing what it is to make do with the basics and be content with God's provision on a daily basis, just enough for each day. My marriage has gone through the battlefield and many times I was sure the end was here for us. Arrow after arrow has been launched to destroy, detour and completely annihilate my children and us as individuals and as a family. 

The attack is real. But, I want you to know that although this rising up of darkness against the Chosen of God is never ending, so is God's grace and power for His children, never ending. His love and His Power is limitless. There is no end to His presence being available to those who believe and call out to the Lord. God is faithful to give us never ending victory against a defeated foes who get their joy by thrashing us and shooting out against us to see us fall. Yet, the Lord in his mercy has taken the time to leave us words of comfort, words of encouragement and instructions to help us know how to fight and how to stand against the wiles of the enemy.

My friend, our help comes from the Lord. Suicide is a voice that speaks into your ears and tells you that your worth and purpose is over. It tells you that there's no reason to live. Divorce comes and stands in your bedroom and tells you that it's better to stop fighting for your marriage and that someone else will make you happy. Sickness comes in to torment your body, your child's body and at times you say, "Lord, if you're healer, where are you and why aren't you healing my child?" We question God and all the while God is not ignoring us, He is saying, Hush my child. Be still. I am at work in this matter. You are not alone. Look at me. Watch me fight for you. I am with you.

Even in the very house of the Lord we experience the struggle for there are many that even in roles of leadership seem more the messengers of darkness than the very people in our lives that have never confessed Christ. We see their fake smiles, and it's easy to detect the presence in them that butts heads with what is in us. We see their lies, their jealousy and their plan to stand in our way of serving the Lord. But, even in this, God reminds us once more that even when our very own family in the Lord is that source of pain and anger, God wants us to see it as the devil at work to being destruction not only in us but in them as well. 

God wants us to be wise and turn to Him. The Lord wants to show us not to focus on the negative but to place our eyes on Him and Him alone so that we remember to give Him glory through all our struggles and all our hard times. God alone gets the glory so that we understand it is not the strength of our arm, our words, how loud we get or how smart we think we are, but it is Jehovah in us to help you experience God's deliverance and God's presence.

Yes, darkness rises against us. Light is greater for God is light and the darkness flees at it's spark. True, evil seems to reign in many parts of our lives and our communities but God's life is greater and if we pursue it, we will experience deliverance and joy! Do not be overcome with discouragement but hold on to the Lord and see that greater is He that is in You than He who is in the world.

If you need prayer or just someone to listen, feel free to share. When we get together to pray for one another and believe God for the pulling down of strongholds and calling upon the Powerful name of Jesus Christ, great things happen.

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I ALMOST FAINTED

Psalm 27:13-14New King James Version (NKJV)

13 I would have lost heart, unless I had believed
That I would see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.

14 Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord!

Lately it has seemed as if so many different kinds of situations have plopped themselves on my lap. Just for a moment in time, there have been moments where the weight of those issues have fallen so heavy upon my chest. I've believed the way out of this situation and being a person of faith in the Lord, I've immediately confessed God being stronger and more powerful than the current waves crashing upon my environment. Still, in those very first moments, I join myself to verse 13 and can say that I also would have lost heart, I would have fainted and I would have given up, unless I had believed that through all the drama and the tumult coming against me, that I would most definitely see and experience the goodness of the Lord. I would experience it in the land of the living, meaning, God's goodness would provide for my lost heart while I am still in the process of going through. I would have fallen apart and gone crazy many, many times- literally, had my heart not learnt to wait, wait, wait and wait on the Lord.

It's hard to wait. But the outcome of waiting is the reward that comes when our prayers are answered and God does the unexpected. No, we were expecting, but I mean, when God does what only an amazing and sovereign God can do what we needed. It is worth all the great because then we rejoice and celebrate God's goodness. Our faith grows as we see God's goodness while we wait. We wait and we pray. We pray and we wait. If you see me you are going to say, "That's one crazy lady!" I pray wherever I am. I'm at a point in my life where I am not afraid to let people know I'm on a journey to being closer to the heart of God. I'm not afraid to praise the Lord in front of others. I've made the decision that He is first and He is real, so why live as if I have something or someone to hide.

I am tired. I won't lie. This journey uphill is often extremely exhausting. There are few water fountains left on the path. But, I've connected to the resource that is Life Giving water. My God supplies for my emotional needs as I wait for Him to supply healing and restoration. My God comforts me when there aren't any arms to wrap themselves around me and pray with me, pray for me. My God is strength when I feel like I would have fainted, he lifts me up, he carries me and he encourages me.

Psalm 27:13-14New King James Version (NKJV)

13 I would have lost heart, unless I had believed
That I would see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.

14 Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord!

My friend, Jehovah will strengthen your heart and comfort you. He will bring the healing if we seek Him. I do not give up believing His Word. We wait on the Lord. Sometimes, impatiently. Sometimes, crying out and loudly. Sometimes, tearfully and sometimes silently. We wait. I will wait on the Lord. Wait, my family, and my friends. God is faithful.