Wednesday, April 29, 2015


Poetry From the Heart 
By Angeline M Duran Santiago

I'm talking to you, girl!
Yes, to you.

Stop waiting to start what you have to start.
Stop waiting to get it done.
Stop sitting down and saying, "Later."

It's not going to get done, unless you get in, knee deep and start working.
It's not going to get accomplished, unless you push those sleeves up and back
And begin.
Walk forward, Get through it, but get it done.

I know you're tired, girl.
You think I don't see the exhaustion in your face?
You're a mess, girl. You need to get it together.
This isn't you.
Yes, I'm talking to you, girl, this picture before me is someone I don't know.

You are strong, girl,
No, you are stronger than strength.
God in you equals strength that never ends.

You are smart, girl.
No, you are capable of greater things than you've done before.
God has given you a Spirit of excellence.
He has chosen, equipped, prepared and told you to get going.
He's with you, behind you, and marching with you.

You are able, girl.
No, more than able.
Greater is He that is in you than he that is not only in the world, but coming against you to exhaust your desire to get up and get going.

You're a fighter girl.
You know that!
Since when did the enemy get a hold on you and get you on your face?
When did you start believing the liar when he speaks.
Forget that! When did you start paying the devil any attention at all?
No weapon formed against you is going to prosper, girl, unless you start focusing on all the weapons of destruction launched against you every day and start waiting to fall.

You're an overcomer!
You're victorious because Jesus Christ has placed His victory into your hands and told you to believe!
 Girl, you're not Alice in Wonderland.
You're not lost in la-la land and falling through the rabbit's hole.

Get on up, girl!
The countdown is almost over.
Get up, girl.
Don't stay broken.
Don't keep listening to those demeaning and oppressive words.
Get your eyes off of those things that push on you to weigh you down
Get your eyes on God's plan, God's triumphant song
Calling you to move to the beat of Heaven's Victory Dance.

Get up, girl.
Get up and dance!
Get up and fight your way through.

 It's gonna get down.
This great work before you will seem small if you place it all in God's hands.
The discouragement will disappear if you proclaim your trust in God's love for you.

Get on up, girl,
Woman of God, 
Woman of Praise,
Woman of war,
Fearless woman filled with God's Spirit 
Heir of God's promises,
Get up on up, girl.
God has called you to RISE! 

Monday, April 27, 2015

*********HE IS AT WORK*********

By Angeline M Duran Santiago

He is,
God is,
at work in our situations.
You may not see Him,
I may not see Him, literally there,
But He is present,
Working it all out for our good.

Just because I don't see Him
In the rough patches,
In the broken pieces,
When I feel alone,
Doesn't mean He is absent.
He is present
Even when my eyes only see my problems.

Just because you don't hear His footsteps
Or His hand at work,
Just because I can't always hear his Voice
or His whispers through the storm clouds
It isn't proof He's walked away
Or has never been there.
Even when my ears can't grasp
the softness of His tip toeing around me,
He is present.
He is at work in me,
He is working it all out for my good.

He knows every part of the ME I am still struggling to comprehend
He knows every inch of my heart
And even when I think He has forgotten all about me,
He is present,
God is in attendance,
Working in my situation,
Working in my life,

In my body,
In my restlessness,

In my weariness,
Reaching out into my troubles
And working it all out for what is best for me.

God is at work,
His Holy Spirit is still moving today.
He moved in the darkness of never ending waters in the beginning of time
And now He is moving
Changing, restoring, plowing,
In the darkness that my life can sometimes become
In the still, lifeless waters of my heart,
Inside, deep inside the depths of my broken life,
Holy Spirit
Moving upon the waters,
Moving in the waters of all I am.
Stirring them,
Making me alive,
He is at work.
I am telling you,
Not because I can hear Him or see Him, or even feel Him,
My inability to prove those things just don't change the fact
that He is,
My God is,
The Lord of Lords is 
Working it all out in me,
He's working it all in you,
In your life,
Because He knows, most truly knows,
What is best, What we need,
He's at work
Completing what He has begun in you and me.

Friday, April 24, 2015

The Boy Who Cried, "Love Me!"

Written By Angeline M Duran Santiago

I didn't see it before.
I never paid it much attention.

We have been trained to believe that silence, most likely, means everything is alright. We've been trained to see quietness as meaning everything is fine. 

So, I never saw it.

I heard him laugh. I saw him dance. I enjoyed my time in his presence watching him tell a story, do his thing as most kids his age do. 

But, I missed it. I missed the clues and the signs that were silent whispers saying, "Look at me.....too." 

Somewhere, lost on the axis of this Earth, spinning away, his voice went unheard. The moments he felt ignored, never seen, and unimportant became more real.

The enemy of the souls of men, always busy roaming the Earth to and fro, found the boy weeping. Rubbing his hands and with a smirk on his mouth, he cleared his venomous filled throat and began to speak the soothing words of despair, discouragement and lies into the boys atmosphere. The lullabies he heard before bedtime now became confirmations that he was second, third, and last, he was invisible, he was a burden, uncared for, and unloved.

I didn't see it. I didn't imagine it.
I saw the boy grow into manhood, always broken, always torn and angry and no matter how much I prayed, I couldn't understand what was wrong or how things had become so impossible.

"Pray." was the only advice given.
"Pray." was the only answer.

But, he was still hurting. He spewed hatred, was easy to speak his mind and shout all the venomous seeds planted so long ago.

Long ago. Yes, long ago the seeds of lies, of betrayal and hurt were deeply planted and they grew, deeply rooted, heavily watered by his tears, every time he felt unloved, every time he felt left out, and as if no one cared.

Wait, but I never saw those seeds. I never saw them begin to sprout. I never knew they were there, nestled in his heart, in his spirit, wrapping themselves with thorns around his thoughts, around his emotions and his life.

He has grown before me and today I saw it. I saw the boy crying out, "Love me!" I heard the boy crying out, "Love me!" I saw the tears that haven't come forth in a long time, run out towards me to grab my face and make me see, make me hear, "Love me!"

But, I have never once stopped loving the boy.
I never once imagined what life would be like without loving him or having a life without him. And that is where all the fault lies, that I couldn't see because I thought it was all perfect.

The boy ran from the painful past, hidden in his childhood room, and ran with all his might into the present. The boy, now man, still cried out, "Love me! Will you love me? Can you love me? Am I lovable? If only by you, Do me?"

Lord, how do I make him see that he has always been my heart, my sun, my moon, and my life? How do I remove the hurt I never saw there and allow the joy that you have for him to grow, to develop, to be planted in place of all these lies?

Lord, Satan has no hold on this boy. As I write these words, I go into the past and I speak against every seed whispered into the soil of this boy's heart. I go into the past and I dig up, dig out, rip away, from the very root, every word spoken to break him, to hurt him, to make him think I never cared, I never loved, or I never saw....him.

I speak healing over his spirit. I speak healing over his heart. I speak your love to rain over the land of his emotions, his memories, and help him see that he is loved, that I love him.

The sound of a storm outside was not a coming storm, only the enemy running away, angry, violently cursing the moment his lies, his seeds of anger and hatred, and his confusing conversations where ripped away and thrown into the night.
"Do not return. The boy belongs to God, to the King of Kings, to the Savior of his soul. You cannot hold on to the boy!"

Night time came, went and brought forth morning.

Tears, a mother's tears, may endure for the night, oh, but the promise of God's word, that joy, JOY, unspeakable JOY comes in the morning.

A few days went by.

The boy had spent the past few days stomping around the house, angry, like a lion looking whom to attack. The boy, the man, huffed and puffed. The boy, cried out, "Love me!" 

I asked the boy how his night had been and the boy began to spill out millions of words sharing what had happened. Then, the boy began to show me his latest dance step and rolled out his arms before me, and he asked me to dance. Taking hold of my hands, he asked me to dance with him, to show him if he was doing it right, to dance if for a moment, to see if what he had been shown was the right step.

An unseen chorus from heaven played their violins to the music inside the boy's head. They listened to the humming of his healing heart and accompanied him with their song. 
"Dance with me, Mom."
And they danced to music that was not there. They danced to the song of healing, of forgiveness, of restoration and reconciliation.
The music of heaven bursting through closed windows, singing peace, singing joy, and singing, "All things are made new!"

The boy cried, "LOVE ME!"
And I responded, "I will, I do, forever and ever, I love you, my son."

I don't know if these words mean anything to you. To me, they are the moments in my life where I have seen the Lord at work in my home. May the music of heaven and the power of God's Love bring restoration and healing into your home. No matter what has gone wrong, God can and will make it right. I pray the Lord blesses you and your family today and always.
 #godwantsmore  #angieduran  #christianblog #fearlessinbattle #daretopray

Saturday, April 18, 2015


By Angeline M Duran Santiago

What can separate (remove, take us away, make a wall between, build a bridge to keep apart, or force away) us, me, and you from God's Love? 

Someone will say, "You're going to believe, even when you are still sick? You're believing even when death showed up? You're going to hold on to that "faith" even when you keep going through such hard times?" And I can ask the agnostic, the atheist, the person who believes in everything else but the God of the bible, "Are you going to keep believing the way you do even when you are sick? Are you going to keep being an atheist when someone you love dies or ends up in the emergency room? Are you going to continue saying you're an agnostic or all hell breaks loose in your life and you decide to such hope for the best?

We've all chosen our path with or without a faith based support system. We've chosen to be lined up with those that believe in the resurrection of Jesus Christ or we've chosen to believe in any hundred other versions that answer what we believe or don't believe. 

At the end of it all, someone's choice to see me as foolish or to both believe the way I do, cannot change or separate me from what I have chosen to hold on to. When I think of this scripture, I think of a boat sailing away and never returning. I envision an airplane flying to an unknown destination. So, I have to understand completely that what I am declaring has to be real or nonsense to my mind and heart. I tell my kids, nothing should shake our faith. If trouble comes knocking at our door, in the midst of the shakedown, hold on to your faith. If sickness comes or continues to hang out, as you're evicting every disease in Jesus Name, nothing can separate us from God's love.

God will continue to love you and me, when we are pulled apart the way a boat or airplane separates families and friends. There can be no barriers, no excuses, no contradictions and definitely no compromises. If you and I are going to follow the Lord, it's going to have to be truly believing that His claim to be who He is, is not only real and true, but that His claim to keep His Word and be with us through every moment in our lives is going to be real also.

Nothing can separate us....
Nor sickness, Nor poverty, Nor riches, Nor fame.

Nothing can keep us apart....
Persecution, Personal attacks, Gossip, Problems.

Nothing can remove us from God's hands....
Life's situations that can be traumatizing, hardship, emergencies, death, misunderstandings, betrayal.

I am convinced, and I ask the Lord to help me be true to what I confess to believe. I will believe in God's promises to keep me together, to keep my family in peace, because come what may, nothing should separate us from God' s love.

Thursday, April 16, 2015

This Is For You

By Angeline M Duran Santiago

This is for you.
For you who lives each moment looking for different ways to encourage others.
You who searches the scriptures, with different faces in your mind, 
Trying to find the perfect one,
Their needs ever before you,
Because you've been praying for them,
They've become a burden you carry,
And you search for a word of hope,
A ray of sunshine that says, "You're not alone."
You get up and walk slowly to the restroom,
You hold on to the sides of the sink
And you pray for strength for one more day,
Not for you,
Not because you feel you deserve any mercy,
But, because you think of others,
You see those who depend on you,
Who need you,
And although your legs are heavy,
You keep, keep holding on.
Even though your body wants to push you back into the bed,
You keep on, keep on holding on.

This is for you,
Who through rain and snow,
Through sickness and more sickness,
You press the go button and plan
according to what you feel others need,
You put your cares aside for just a few minutes
And pray that each word will tug at a heart
And hear the call of the Lord saying,
"You're not alone. Keep, keep holding on."

This is for you.
For you who tries to inspire,
To Motivate,
To lift up those who have given up,
You celebrate those who are doing something for the Lord,
Or maybe just taking baby steps,
You make a big deal anyways, 
Because you,
You are a world changer and you know it takes one life at a time.
You want to make a difference,
And, so you cover your present pain,
Share only as needed about your personal struggles
Your body, a monument with battle scars
Is something only few have seen,
Still, onward you march
Waving a Victory Flag that says, "Go! Run!
Keep on Keeping on!
Keep holding on! 

Your voice, an echo of consolation,
Filling the airwaves with the message of hope,
Sending the sound of redemption
Of Calvary's triumph,
Through the winds of our time,
This is for you.
Thank you,
Thank you for your obedience to speak the Word
In and out of season,
Thank you for sharing a song
When your own song was filled with a cry for help,
You played a song of Victory, never ending worship
Never ending Praise
To the healer, to the Redeemer, To the One who loves us.
Thank you.

Lovingly dedicated to the Christian Radio DJs, but especially to two who are living the scripture, "These are they who are turning the world upside down" Acts.
With love, for Tito, family prayer warrior
With love, for Alex, for joining in Tito's vision 
With love, for my brother, Tito, who took his love for the Lord and turned it into one amazing ministry. For Alex, who joined with him to make the praises and the word of the Lord known.

Dedicated to the DJs at


Wednesday, April 15, 2015


By Angeline M Duran Santiago

If I begin to share just a fraction of what I've been going through lately, fact is, a thousand people can write back and say, "Girl, you ain't going through nothing, yet. Let me tell you what I've been through." And, fact is, it's all true. Someone's pain may always hurt more. Someone's situation will always be worse. Our complaint will always seem small compared to our neighbors scream for help. My problem may seem like a spec compared to someone, who although may have remained quiet and not even shown their troubles, may be facing their own firing squad when it comes to matters of the heart, everyday situations and just plain life.

I've often wondered, "Lord, when do we stop praying for the answer?" I mean, sometimes, it just seems we move forward, believing that somehow, He is guiding us and walking with us as we take the next steps. Isn't it hard though? Sometimes the answer doesn't appear like the smoke letters made by an airplane in the sky. Sometimes we don't hear that audible voice, "Angie, take that apartment and don't worry about anything." Sometimes, we are in the waiting zone, as if we were in the game, Family Feud, waiting to see if we know the answer and we just want to hit the button to see if we have the number one answer. Instead, I think I have the invisible panic button.

I wonder if God laughs every time I run around like a chicken without a head, looking for the panic button, when I need to be still and just believe that God is not going to let my life go to the dumps. You and I may not see the what we need to see right now, but I guess, that's what this Faith Walk is all about, right?

"But, my son is still sick!" You shout at me, and I could shout back, "So is mine!"

"I'm stuck in this rut and I can't get out!" You throw at me. I can reply and say, "Welcome to my world!"

We can go on and on, back and forth, trying to outdo one another with our woes and wrongs, and once more, I imagine our Great Awesome God just watching us to see when we'll run out of breath and finally change our conversations, change our attitudes, and throw away the panic button. I imagine the Lord, "Any minute now....."
Tick, Tock, Tick, Tock,
And He waits until something clicks in our hearts, in our minds, deep inside our spirit and revelation and understanding come alive and the panic button disappears because, "I got it!!!!"

So, instead, of,  "Ay, bendito, muchacho, what I've been going through, I'm dying like a dead man, almost." and instead of, "Brother, I can't help you cause I'm wasted, man, walking like a zombie in dead man's valley, man, you know." And instead of, "Where's God!!!???"

We begin to put our faith into action. We put aside the hundred books on our bedside, dust off the Bible, and begin to look for God's promises and what the Lord says to us today. I love to find promises, highlight them, then place a P next to it so that every time I see it, I'm reminded it's a promise for me and my family. Sometimes I even write the date if God speaks to me in regards to something, and this way, when the answer comes, I have promises that have stayed with me through my every step.

So, panic button go away! Arise the positive speaker in you. Arise the person of faith and the believer in God's mercy, goodness and love.

You are there. Hidden somewhere. You are that person that will not only speak forth words of life into your own situation, but into others. You will declare the works of the Lord! You will not only inspire yourself, but others. You will get up and do great things. So, panic button away, and watch out world, as God's people step out in faith.

Tuesday, April 14, 2015


By Angeline M Duran Santiago

The news and weather channels had spent the past three days alerting everyone on the island about the incoming storm that would most likely not be a false prediction. Some families had stored food and covered their homes with boards while others had packed up their most important papers and valuables, and moved on, away to where many were saying the storm wouldn't hit so aggressively.

The airports were filled with people trying to get a one way ticket to anywhere but here and streets were jammed with all size vehicles attempting to get as far away from the coming tempest. The latest report said the storm, some predicting devastating waves, perhaps even a tsunami, would be fierce and without mercy upon the island in less than two days. Without warning, the internet and all media was interrupted, panic began to run through the streets like a swarm of bees, and people blindly lost their way. Many panicked and just ran into the first home they saw. Some closed their doors and ran to hide in a safe room. A few had created underground shelters and cried in their shelters while many banged and cried out to them to open up. 

Everyone, even beast small and great, felt the thunderous sound of incoming winds and waves that drowned the voices of worry and fear. The sirens were like the soft sound of butterflies, and emergency workers trying to direct people and traffic with the latest speakers and technology seemed like an unseen treasure buried in the soil while busy ants just hurried around them without a purpose or destiny.

Nayim held her three children close to her as she walked through the trees. The path had become darker as the clouds walked down upon the island. Her children cried and she shushed them, reminding them of safety up ahead. The whispers in the night had told her not to wait two days but to begin her journey as the sun announced the new day. The whispers of someone ancient and as old as time had awakened her, pushing her to pack her belongings and run to the mountains. "But how?" She had questioned. "How could safety be up in the mountains where the winds would be the most violent force before her?" Still, the message in the wind had asked her to trust, to rise, and go towards the mountains.

Believing that the ancient voice might have been a heavenly messenger, she chose to ignore neighbors who called her crazy and here she was, with her three children, climbing and pushing against the winds. At times, not knowing which direction to take, it seemed the path would be made clear just as she felt like giving up. A light would show the way, trees would unexpectedly seem to move away from one another as if they were doors, opening and inviting her inside. Her children cried and complained. They were tired, exhausted, with cuts and scrapes on their legs and knees.With love and patience, she reminded and promised them of a safety she did not see, of a promise she had only heard about, and of a mountain top that would be a refuge.

"Oh, but to stand on the mountain and be blown away. Can it be that I am being asked to sacrifice my children and myself by going to the top and realize it was all a bad dream?" Over and over, many times, doubt came. As the winds became fierce, cutting away at them, making the leaves and large grass blades move against them, cutting away at their arms and faces. "Oh, Lord, show me what to do." she cried. She reminded her children to pray and to believe.

Up they went and soon found themselves upon the mountain top. Alone. Forsaken. To meet their end. Surely the winds would blow, the waves would rise higher than the mountain top and take them away. She told the children to stay near the ridge of the mountain near some trees. She decided to walk to the side and see if there was any way of finding their purpose for being there. Surely, not even God would have played tricks with her mind and have asked her to go on a suicide mission during the worst weather. 

As Nayim neared the side, an old man, dressed in tattered robes, came around and stood before her. "Come. Come quickly. Take the children and bring them closer to me!" the old man shouted. "Bring them closer to the top?" Nayim realized this was madness as she discovered she was not only on one of the highest mountains on the island, but that she stood in front of the ocean. The vast waters swooshed and moved dangerously around the island, promising to rise higher and higher as the winds enabled them to. "How can you ask me to bring them up to you when the winds are getting higher? My children will fall into the waters below." Nayim cried out back and refused to heed the old man's advice. "Hurry! You are going to have to trust me when I tell you I have prepared a hiding place for them, but be quick about it. Time is not on your side." 

With tears in her eyes, she looked at the man who reminded her to hope and believe that strangers could possibly be angels in disguise. Although fear was winning as she grabbed her children, her oldest spoke out, "Mom, don't be afraid." Feeling her strength and courage renewed, she held on to her three children with all her might and began to help them walk sideways on the mountain and towards the old man. "Don't look down. Keep your eyes on him." Nayim encouraged her children and celebrated each step. At times the wind made her voice disappear, but still, with her eyes, she reminded them to keep their eyes on him as he opened his arms and beckoned them to move towards him. As the children got closer, she began to see an entrance into the mountain and smiled. Surely, the Lord had provided a hiding place for them. 

The old man reached out to her children and one by one, assisted them to help them carefully enter the opening in the mountain. As her last child, her youngest was entering, he seemed to lose his footing and her mind saw him falling. Moving quickly, she forced her tired weight to press upon him, pushing him upward into the entrance. He held tightly on to the exposed rocks and spaces. It was in that moment the old man looked at her and she knew she was either going to fully surrender her trust in him, or let go. Allowing her heart to trust in his eyes, she allowed his ancient arms to wrap around her youngest child and hold him in place, turning ever so quickly so that her child was against the entrance and the old man was now with his back upon her child. 

Feeling she would not make it through, she smiled, hoping the old man knew that he should watch over her children should she lose her life as the waves continued to escalate upward and with greater strength. "Hold on to the cleft. Hold on to the side and don't let go!" As she saw his eyes widen, she turned to look around and stood against the mountain. It was there she witnessed the ever increasing and growing waves. The waves rose like giants awakening from slumber, rising from their beds and getting on to their feet. Waves rolled upward into the skies like darkness fighting the sunlight and commanding shadows to take over the island. Nayim pressed her entire body against the mountain side, knowing the old man had somehow made sure her last child had entered the hiding place. As she pressed her already bleeding skin against the mountains, the old man came around to her side and smiled. She closed her eyes as the tsunami rose against her, cold, cutting away, stealing her breath, crushing her lungs, pounding upon her face, and stealing her spirit away into the darkness.

"Save me, Lord." Nayim whispered into the disappearing spaces as the waters covered her and everything around her. She felt the crashing and the beating of angry waters, somehow punishing her for daring to stand against the storm, mocking her for remaining at the mountain top while others had run and hidden. "Hold on," the ancient whispers sang around in her head. "You are not alone."

The howling of the winds began to whimper, and like a scared dog, began to run away.  Shadows covered their faces and moved away as the sun pushed through. Nayim's knees had given out and she found herself bent against the mountains, somehow in a crouched position, soaking wet, pain filled, but still alive. As she felt the warmth of the sun beaming upon the island and her skin, she opened hurtful and burning eyes to see the rays of light coming forth from the Ancient One who stood on the side of the mountain. He smiled and invited her to come around and go check on her children. Tired, famished, and weakened, Nayim dragged herself towards the side of the mountain and crawled towards the Old Man and near the mouth of the mountain. There were her three children, resting upon rocks, covered in blankets, dry and with smiles on their faces. Sleep had overtaken them and they had perhaps not even know the storm had come and gone. "Thank you," she said, barely unable to speak the words. She turned around to tell the Ancient One she was so grateful. All she saw was his back as he somehow walked away, disappearing into the mountain side.

Nayim was so exhausted, she crawled in near to her three children and allowed the exhaustion to make way for sleep. She entered into a deep sleep as if there were no cares, no worries, only the song, the invitation to trust, trust in the Ancient of Days, to call upon Him who was always near, to learn to hide in Him, to always cast all her cares upon Him for He would always make a way.

Maybe Nayim and her children are real. Maybe they were all part of a dream. Maybe Nayim's experience was just a warning of a storm to come and to show that even if the tempest were to come with a destructive plan towards this family, or any family, at the end, those that trust in the Name of the Lord will be saved. It is my hope and my desire that my short stories will inspire you to believe, to turn to God, to get excited and interested in seeking and finding out for yourselves if this Great Awesome God I talk about is not only real, but worth all my time in writing these, perhaps silly, short stories. Maybe, just maybe, Nayim and her three children are really me and my three kids. Or perhaps, this is a story about you. If it is about you, then you know how it ends. You and your family are in God's hands, and he waltzes away with the music of heaven turning into a lulluby for you and your family, as you enter celestial resting time. The storm will always come, but isn't it great to know that so will He, the One that rides upon the storms, and the One that speaks to the storms and says, "Peace, be still." You decide if you are in my story or not, if it is about me, or if it just a message challenging you to trust and hope in Him, while the storm rages on. But, remember, the storm will soon cease and die and you will rise again.

Saturday, April 11, 2015


By Angeline M Duran Santiago

My senses are awakened as the alarm clock goes off, and I look for a way to hit the snooze button. My eyes are alert but my body is begging for more sleep. I think of the countless things that must be done today. I would like to say that the first thing I do, always, is give God thanks for a new day and then have some quiet time in His presence. Truth is, sometimes, time is running out and I have to rush out and away. It's in my daily walk to the train station that I begin to Praise Him. It's on the train station as I wait for the train, that I remind Him to watch over my kids, my family, and all our many decisions that are hanging on a thread. And, its during my ride to work, that I take out the Scriptures, and read, asking the Holy Spirit to speak to my life, to speak to my kids, to make Himself real to my husband, to my dad, to all of us.

The question is, through all this morning drama, today I was off. As I laid in bed, counting the seconds to getting up and going about my day, I realized it was time to not only lay all my cares before the Lord, but to make a decision. Yes, right here in this darkness, while my husband snores away like a hundred bears and dragons locked away in a den, I knew God was asking me to trust Him. No complaining, no looking at what seems impossible or coming apart. No looking at the problem, just looking at Him. 

"Do I trust you, Lord?"
My heart and my mind were confessing complete assurance and reliance on His ability to get me through my situation, but something inside of me, worry, becoming anxious, and even feeling left alone to face the world, sometimes, gives way to the question, "Do I trust you, Lord?"

"Will I trust you, Lord?"

I smiled because I knew the answer and I knew who was trying to plant the seeds of doubt into my morning. 


"Yes, I will trust you, Lord."
"You have my well being in your heart."
"You know my next steps and the direction I need to move in. You guide me and lead me. Of course, I will trust You, Lord. Your favor will open doors for me. Your grace will cover me and give me the ability to speak the way I need to and keep me quiet when silence means more."

"Yes, Lord. I will wait on your help. My helps comes from you. Why have I despaired and worried? Why have I turned to others with my problems when I have had you here, all along, ready to assist me and provide for all my needs?"

"Yes, I will trust you, Lord!"
"You know when my prayers will be answered.
You know when our bodies will be healed. You know all about my finances and what I can have and what I don't need. You know where my next home or apartment is and I know you will not allow me to make a mistake in choosing where to go. For you know our needs. You know how far we can be stretched- mentally, physically, and in our hearts."

I stay in bed and decide to focus on God's goodness, on His love for me and my family. I decide to see His hand at work in our situation and suddenly my mind is at peace. Well, there's still a little bit of my human emotions in conflict because time and other issues seems to push me to feel overwhelmed, but one thing I do, is declare, "I trust You, Lord!"

So, what about you, my friend. Are you here in the same boat with me? Is there sickness or anguish keeping you down? Are you in a situation where your finances or your home has become the focus because you've been forced to make changes? Are you in a battle with people in your life, your job, your family, your friends, or the devil himself? Do you find yourself exhausted, angry and wondering if you can trust the Lord through all this?

Declare your victory! Say, "Yes, I will trust in God's promises! Yes! He will come for me. Yes, He will fight for me! Yes, He will go before me! Yes, He makes all things new! Yes, I trust in God as my Healer and Deliverer! Yes. I will trust You, Lord, today and always!"

May I recommend something that will give you a word of encouragement and some music to get you singing before the Lord?
Check this out. You just might enjoy it!

Friday, April 10, 2015

* * * * * * LAY IT DOWN * * * * * *

By Angeline M Duran Santiago

Have you ever heard of the phrase, "Lay it down."?
Has anyone ever told you, "Just lay it all down."?

What do these words mean? What does this phrase tell us?

 lay- macmillan dictionary
1-[transitive] to put someone or something down in a careful way, especially so that they are lying flat
2-[transitive] to carefully plan and prepare something that will be needed in the future to achieve an aim

 lay-synonyms Merriem-Webster
 a rhythmic series of musical tones arranged to give a pleasing effect <the minstrel strummed a cheerful lay on his lute

I can go on and on about the different meaning I found. The ones below are the most commonly understood meanings for lay. (Put something or someone down carefully.) Hmmmm, what do I have in my life that I need to place down, carefully?

The next meaning tells me that to lay means to plan and prepare something I am going to need later on. Lay down, such as planning, because I am looking forward to achieving a goal. Well, let's see, what do I have to plan, lay down, with the understanding that I am laying it down with a purpose?

We say, "I lay down my life before you Lord." "I lay down my heart, my will, my future and my family before you, Lord."

And so we begin to do so with the mentality that that which is placed carefully before the Lord is probably those important people in our lives, our jobs, our homes and even our emotions. We take those areas in our lives that are delicate, in need of being taken care of in a special way, and we lay them at the feet of Jesus. 

There's a hope, a goal, something that we look forward to as we lay it all down. Believers will immediately identify with their eternal lives with Jesus in heaven. But, what about right now? As much as I look forward to my future according to scriptures, I also believe we can lay it all down with an expectation that is not far away. We carefully place our prayers before the Lord. 

What are you believing for in the future, the near future, like our tomorrows and next week, or coming year? We believe for healing, physical and mental restoration. We cry out for deliverance. We wait upon the Lord for a change in our jobs, our financial situation, and our homes. We lay down our relationships, our marriages, our needs, our children, and our hearts. 

 photo copied from

The last definition I thought was interesting to add to what lay means, has to do with music. A rhytmic series of musical tones arranged to give a pleasing affect. I can't see this any other way than a dancer, with all her/his heart and passion slowly and ever so beautifully taking their very own lives and placing it down. I also see the dancer who moves vibrantly as seen in an African dance, in a continual motion, surrendering their all before their audience, their audience of One.

I see Jesus as the perfect example of laying it all down. He says he lays down his life, our of his own will, not because anyone was forcing him to do so, but out of his love for the world. He lays it down and then shares this future plan, this hope that he gives humanity. He lays it down but will take it back and rise again. In order to truly give us a future, he allows death to have a moment in his life as he lays it all down- His Kingdom, Being who He Is and Was, His last breath, yes, he lays it all down, not once running away, but always looking ahead, thinking of human hearts, thinking about resurrection. 

Is God asking us to lay our lives down unto death? Not the same death he experienced, but we are to die to ourselves and arise in the new life that Christ laid out for us. We can lay our lives down and live continually placing our lives before Him like a never ending dance, a prayer of surrender to the Lord. We need to look at our expected end. We also need to have a hope, not just a very far away hope after we leave this world as all humans must at one time, take our last breath. But, God invites us to lay down our lives, lay out a plan, and listen to the music of his heart, his calling, and dance as the music leads us to. We also are asked to be confident and not afraid as we come and lay it all down before the cross. 

What are you still holding on to? Lay it down.
What is still heavy on your shoulders, your heart and your mind? Lay it down.
What is the extra baggage you and I are still clinging on to, holding on for dear life because we believe if we let it go, our lives will be completely altered? Lay it down.

This is what I ask the Lord to help me to accomplish.
Lord, help me to lay down the things in my life that weigh me down and don't let me breathe and move forward, so that I can truly lay down a new plan for my life and know that my future, my tomorrow and my next days are truly in your care. Help me Lord to freely release every care, ever fear, every insecurity, any areas of un-forgiveness and bitterness, even things I cannot see, help me move to the beat of your music, and place it all down at the foot of the cross.



By Angeline M Duran Santiago  The storm rages on and the winds buffet the lands in violent twirls. Some say it is the season for hur...